3 Benefits of Keeping Your Love Life Private

“The real perk of being married is getting to take lots of pictures and post them online and change your last name on Facebook.” – Bailie, age 19, newly married.

Having ten years of dating and relationships over my adorably young newlywed neighbor has made me realize how different life is when you choose to keep your love life private. Social media has created a platform for us to not only share everything about our lives but also show it off. In a recent social experiment, one Instagram user decided to stop seeking validation for her photos from the way she looked at started captioning them with what was really going on to give people a dose of reality about what lies behind those picture perfect moments.

Life online is built on picture perfect moments where we cannot see the fighting, the long days, the lack of affection, and the other insecurities that modern day couples face. The more the late-20s and beyond generation starts to realize this, the more we see couples stepping away from plastering their private love life on social media. The result – happier, healthier relationships, and here are a few reasons why.

1. The Only Validation You Need is Your Own

If we wanted to simply show our friends and family pictures of our last vacation, we could do so via email. Instead, we post them online for friends, family, acquaintances, and even perfect strangers to like and comment on. We want to know that they think our latest adventure was cool and noteworthy. When you eliminate that form of validation, you discover that the only one that matters is your own. What does it matter is @Jane123 is jealous of your trip to Bermuda? You didn’t take the trip for her!

2. Minimize Insecurities in a Relationship

Dating when I was 19 is grossly different than it is now simply because I didn’t have to worry about people flirting with my boyfriends online. When I asked many of my friends why they keep their relationships offline or why some of their partners are not even on social media, they all universally agreed that it keeps insecurities at a low. There are no misconstrued opinions about what is happening online and therefore there is no breeding ground for their partners to manifest problems in their relationship that do not exist.

3. Private Moments are Better Offline

There is a special sort of peace that comes when you realize how much happier you are when your special moments with your partner are just between you and them. Your closest friends can always join you for lunch to look through your photographs of the latest adventures – they don’t need to be online. Keeping your moments sacred gives them more power in your personal life and helps solidify that bond you have with each other.

The best parts of your relationship don’t require you to take pictures and don’t require social media. An added bonus of keeping your personal life private is that you learn to depend on each other and resolve issues with each other instead of turning to your friends, family, and followers hoping for someone to stand on your side. Thus continuing to build a stronger bond in your relationship and yielding a happier and more successful love life.