6 Questions to Test Compatibility on a First Date

Jul 26, 2015
by Leanne Clute

Streamline your dating life by tackling the true details that make you compatible with another person. Believe it or not, it has less to do with life goals and how many kids that you want and more to do with whether or not your personalities will clash. Our personalities can clash with another person for the simplest of reasons like the way they chew or snore. What often seem like minor issues because the BIG annoyances that deter relationships completely. Ask these six questions on your next date to reveal whether or not there is a future with your match.

1. What Are Three Words You Would Use to Describe Yourself and Why?

If you were to ask my housemate to describe himself, he would say that he is laidback. His girlfriend and I are in agreement that he is far from that. He knitpicks and complains about the most insignificant details of almost everything. It’s so bad that it is annoying. Asking someone to describe themselves and then give an example/reason why makes us think more about what we might say to someone else. If you realize that someone who needs to have everything exactly so right down to the color of the trashbags is not for you, it is better to find out on the first date than further down the road.

2. What Are the Things That Irritate You the Most?

Irritations are a big one. There are some things that you simply cannot change about another person and if it is something that irritates you, it will drive you insane constantly. For example, laziness in a partner irritates me. I don’t want to be with someone who sits home playing video games all day long or seems allergic to the concept of putting the dishes IN the dishwasher when it is empty, not just in the sink. I also cannot stand when people put groceries in the fridge, still in the bag, completely unorganized or who generally have no sense of space for others. These things drive me batty! I’ve met men who do these things. It’s better to get out early on than hope it will change down the road.

3. What is Your Guilty Pleasure?

This question is fun to ask because it gives you an insight as to how a person lets go. My guilty pleasures range from watching The Vampire Diaries to eating Mexican stone ground chocolate. But what is a person’s guilty pleasure is drugs or inappropriate behavior or something that doesn’t jive with your lifestyle/personality?

4. What is the Craziest Idea You Have for the Future?

For seven years I have been working with the same editor. Two years ago I pitched the idea that if we ever met, we would have to do it in Times Square and reenact the WWII ending kiss. We both think it’s a hilarious idea that we plan to fulfill – someday. Once when I told this to a guy on the first date he said it was childish and silly! Maybe it is, but it’s still something that I think is great. We all have our own crazy ideas but our ideas don’t always jive with someone else’s. It’s much like dating someone who never leaves the house when all you want to do is travel with them.

5. What Was Your Best Relationship, Why and Why Did it End?

Nothing gets you to the heart of things faster than this question. Your goal is to find out why a relationship did not work despite the fact that it was great and then determine whether or not it matters to you. For example, I had a friend who said that she ended her relationship because her partner had gained weight and she was no longer attracted to him. Aside from that, everything was perfect. While this is her personal preference, it doesn’t change the fact that someone else who is more self-conscious about their weight might not be okay with it. There is nothing worse than obsessing over the idea that your partner will leave you if you don’t live up to their standards.

6. Do You Believe in Love?

Everyone has a different view on love. I believe that it can be just like the moves – epic and earthshattering. But there are plenty of people in this world who was say that the love they feel for a favorite pen is no more or less significant than what they feel for a potential mate. A successful relationship needs two people to have the same beliefs in love. Without that, you are left struggling to make a connection when you are both reading different books.

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