Our tastes in music are as different and personal as our tastes in people. We often wear our musical tastes proudly because they show a lot about who we are and how we fit into a social scene.

My "real job" as a musician has given me some pretty unique insights into how people react to different types of songs in particular situations. Here are some ideas about how you can use music to help you out before, during, and after, your next Lavalife date.

"Walk tall, or baby don't walk at all"
-- Bruce Springsteen, New York City Serenade
So, you're getting ready for the big date. We all know the drill -- shower, choose your clothes, primp, make sure there's nothing hanging out of your nose. The music you're playing in the background can have a great effect on your mood going into the date and that can influence the all-important first impression you make.

The key here is to keep it up. You want to show confidence, so pick a piece of music that makes you stand and walk tall. I'm a big Springsteen fan so I often play his It's Hard to be A Saint in The City because it makes me feel tough enough to take on anything. Your choice could be anything from "West Side Story"'s I Feel Pretty to James Brown's I Got You (I Feel Good). Play the theme from Rock if you want, as long as it gives you a boost of self-confidence.

"The band was singin' and playin' a tune"
--Cheap Trick, Love Comes A Tumblin' Down

Forget about going to a movie… especially if it's a first date. Go see a live act; it'll give you more opportunities to interact with each other. Hopefully, by this point you'll know a few things about your date, so tailor your choice of music accordingly. If they're into chamber music, don't take them to see your favorite death metal band.
If you've decided to see an indie group, you'll get big points if you go to see a band where you know one of the members. You can introduce your date to the band and maybe hang out backstage (if there actually is a backstage). That's pretty cool… and odds are your date will find it memorable.

"We can dance if we want to"
--Men Without Hats, Safety Dance

OK… Here's a big question: do you dare to dance?

I dance like Elaine on "Seinfeld," so the answer for me is a categorical no. But if you think you can pull it off, go for it. We reveal a lot about ourselves when we dance, so if you can convince your date to dance with you, you might learn something about them and you'll have an opportunity for some contact (if that's what you're looking for). I remember playing a bunch of shows where this one girl would dance all by herself right in front of the stage. I'd always get the same question from people after the show: "Who was that girl?" She was a great dancer; so if you've got good moves and want to draw some attention to yourself, don't feel like you need your date to dance with you.

"When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV"
--Mike Damone, Fast Times at Ridgemont High

I always thought that when it came time to set the mood back at my place, going with something soft was the key. My fallback choice was always an album called Geronimo, by Chris Brown and Kate Fenner. It seemed to do the trick pretty well and was obscure enough that at the very least, it prompted some conversation.
However, scientific research shows that music with a strong pulse works better than softer fare. It seems that a strong beat arouses the same brain waves that we associate with intimate contact. My suggestion is to hit the middle ground and go for some sweet soul music. It's got the scientifically proven backbeat and the right sentiments. Perhaps some Otis Redding, Sam Cooke or Alicia Keys might do the trick. As much as I love Marvin Gaye, playing Let's Get it On might be a little too transparent.

"It's near the end of my song"
--Blink 182, Hoe

After the date is over, you can still let the music do the talking for you. A good mix CD can go a long way in keeping you on your date's mind. Choose your songs wisely -- your mix can be just as personal as a love letter.

Make your music work for you and you can change your theme song from Love Among the Ruins to Love is All Around.

Best of luck,

The Date Detective

Content provided by: Lavalife